My Family is Crazy!

     My family is crazy, and I don't mean that in the way everyone else does. I mean there are actually court records and psychological reports on file stating that my family is crazy. Which makes all the traditional family holidays so much more interesting. It's just not the holidays unless someone threatens to kill someone else over commenting on the exact consistency of sweet potatoes. Sweet potatoes that were brought every year and that no one ate. I always kind of thought that it was the same dish of potatoes since it never seemed to change. Same bowl and same smears on the sides each year. I was never brave enough to try them but they were brought by someone who couldn't cook, and by couldn't cook I mean macaroni that is both under cooked and burned.
     I always hated going to my relatives places for the holidays because there would never be anything I could eat there. They know my food allergies but just don't care. In fact they would get mad at me for not doing they same thing they do in attempting to be normal to the point of injury. Since a turkey dinner is what "normal" people serve for thanksgiving, a turkey would be served. Then after dinner I would have to go around and dispense benadryl and remind people to breathe. Every one of them would feel ill and have rashes all over. Yet every year without fail a turkey would be served and eaten. They all see me as the odd one because I refuse to join in. Since they don't care about me I would be stuck with a glass of water and a piece of roast so dry it would stick between my teeth and I would butter it to attempt to improve the flavor. After diner I would still be hungry but no one would care.
     After I got old enough I stopped going to the family dinners. Partly because I wasn't formally invited and partly because I didn't want to go. See I found a place to go on holidays where people care about me getting a good meal and being able to join in. I don't have to sit there quietly with an empty plate for over an hour watching others eat. I can even bring a dish and people will eat it and not mock it like what would usually happen. One year my family "accidentally" knocked my dish to the floor breaking it and spilling what would have been a nice meal all over the floor. There was even laughing about it. Now that I'm older I really do feel that I should be able to choose how to spend my holidays and with whom. Luckily I found a great man who is willing to share his family. I wouldn't say they are perfect but they are worlds better than what I was born into.